Chairman's Challenge

The Chairman's Challenge for June was write a hundred words on 'tedious' Our Vice - Chair Barbara Groom had the task of judging it. One I know she didn't find easy although she thoroughly enjoyed it.

1st - Barbara Maitra

I’m undeniably discriminated against. I’m an orphaned tubby, short arsed donkey sequestered on a starvation patch. I count the blades of grass, how tedious!

The 2 stallions call me wonky donkey and feast 5 star in the top field.

I’m planning to kick pretty boy Banjo to death one day, followed by a swift getaway. Boyo I can run like a Rhino. The other brat gets a nip from me if I get close but I’m cooking up something nasty for him also.

I admit I’m psychologically disturbed but Life in solitary does this to you. Think I’ll lie down now. Dreaming up death threats puts me to sleep nicely.

2nd - Sue Ross

How tedious is

The daily dodge

Of marching cones,

Regrouping nightly

New formations spring around each bend

(Just to keep you on your toes)

They guard the highways,

Wait to catch us out,

Is it this way, that way?

Who bloody knows?

And all the time

The furtive cameras

Lurk

3rd - Brenda Carter

When I was at school I thought it was boring to stay with Aunt Jenny for tea because Mum worked. No T.V. and all those antiques.

How tedious, I thought as a teenager, that Mum insisted that I do errands for my Aunt.

It was tedious to sit with my Aunt as she grew older. But a maggot wormed in my brain so I paid especial attention.

Aunt Jessie passed away and I felt guilty with hope.

But oh, how tedious it was to sort out her precious things; she’d made me an executor of her will and left everything to charity.

Chairman's Challenge

Last month's chairman's challenge was 'I knew it was a mistake the moment it was over.' Beverley, bless her, agreed to judge this one a task I know she didn't find easy. However, a decision had to be made and the results are

1st - Simon Whaley

I knew it was a mistake the moment IT was OVER. IT was only four foot three whereas OVER was nine foot two. IT had always wanted one over on OVER and OVER had never wanted to be IT. But the moment I pulled the switch, the transformation was complete. IT was now OVER and OVER was now IT. OVER’s expression demonstrated that OVER would never be over IT, but IT was chuffed at being OVER. IT stood up and with one fatal step crushed OVER. For OVER, it was all over and IT was most definitely it.

2nd - Phyllis Blakemore

I felt quite comfortable inside my little compartment. A bit cramped but it was lines with foam so I was quite snug. It was dark and the noise outside was quite alarming, but it was my choice so I must put up with it.

I felt in my pocket, with great difficulty, for a piece of chocolate, good – I managed that. It’ only one minute now and I shall be on the move.

Oh, here I go, there is a swaying feeling and I know I am moving very quickly, the noise is now terrifying, It’s like the roar of a thousand jets engines.

Now I am on the very brink of Niagara Falls in my barrel. A sickening drop, then “I knew it was it was a mistake the moment it was over.”

and joint 3rd

Di Perry

‘Enjoy a Tequila as you paddle in the turquoise ocean. Take a stroll along the palm fringed beaches. Go back in time and see the Maya temples rising from the steaming jungle. Visit the picturesque cities and towns crammed full of culture, and enjoy the variety of water sports and night life, perhaps finishing with a feast from a Taco stand’

There was silence, and I knew it was a mistake the moment it was over.

Giving a sales pitch on holidays to Mexico was not one of my best career moves.

3rd Brenda Carter

I was fed up with my friend Angie. As long as I had known her she’d gone on about her dreadful ex-boyfriend. I’d never met him but she said he’d been unfaithful from the very start. She’d looked through his mobile, found the evidence and chucked him.

I moved away and fell for a charming man and didn’t see very much of Angie. But I asked her to my wedding.

It was after the reception was over that I knew I shouldn’t have done it. While my husband was on his mobile I read the note Angie had slipped me. It read: “You’ve just married my ex.”

Beware of typos

Yes just one simple slip of the finger can totally change the meaning of what you're writing. Take tonight's Shropshire Star for example. There is an article plus photograph of Miss Edith Elizabeth Bufton who is shown celebrating her 100th birthday with her nephew. However, in reporting this joyous occasion Hannah Costigan of the Shropshire Star obviously got carried away with the whole event. She wrote 'Despite reaching 100, Elizabeth still LOVES independently and keeps active.'

Well all I can add to that is good luck to Miss Bufton and long may she continue.

Attingham Park declared a resounding success

Following a meeting this afternoon at Attingham Park the Book Fair in May has been a wonderful success. So much so, plans are now underway to repeat it again next year, which I think is wonderful news. So watch this space. Next year, things will be bigger, better and probably instead of two days we'll do three so that means longer too.

My thanks go to Dorothy Nicolle, Simon Whaley, Mike White and all those who were involved in organising this event. Also thanks to Barbara Groom, Mollie Bolt, Nicola Vincent, Julie Phillips, Fiona and Steve Smith, Jenny Kiernan, Darren Bailey, Di Perry, Phyllis Blakemore, Brenda Carter, Beverley Woodhead (and if I've forgotten anyone please forgive me, or email me and I'll add you to the list) for turning up. Also thanks to Wrekin Writers for the Chairman's Challenges that were on display. We showed Shropshire what a bunch of talented writers we are.

Also I have to say a great big thanks to the authors who turned up. You guys were the stars of the show and I promise you'll get an invitation to next year's event.

And finally, the competition. Well there has been a delay in announcing the results but rest assured the winners will be notified within the next few days.

Thanks again guys without you, your support and enthusiasm Wrekin Writers wouldn't be the fantastic group it is.

My Mum

Three years ago today my lovely Mum was 'Promoted to Glory' and although I was privileged to be with her when she died there is not a day goes by that I don't miss her dreadfully.

Writing about someone you love and you've lost is incredibly difficult and I'm not even going to try. Instead I want to share a poem with you that over the past three years I have found to be of immense comfort.

Death is Nothing at All

Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)


Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away into the next room,
I am and you are you,
Whatever we were to each other that we still are.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way, which you always used,
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow,
Laugh as we always laughed,
At the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect,
Without the trace of a shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant,
It is the same as it ever was.
There is unbroken continuity,
Why should I be out of mind,
Because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval,
Somewhere very near,
Just around the corner, all is well.

To my Mum thank you. Thank you for your love, your laughter,
your sense of fun, your drive, your determination but most of all thank you for
being my Mum.

I will alway love you. God bless xx

New Wrekin Writer

Congratulations to Jenny Keirnan on the birth of her son Robin Stephen Keirnan on 29th May. Knowing Jenny we certainly have a new Wrekin Writer. Loads of love sweetheart and I know I'm speaking from the group, we wish you and your son every happiness.xx

Chapter and Verse

What a week! Monday afternoon I went to a writers’ workshop run by Jeff Phelps. I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon although I suspect it didn’t quite go according to plan. One of the participants asked how can an editor edit fiction? I suppose in the ideal world no one has the right to edit your creativity but we don’t live in an ideal world and the bottom line is, if you want your work published, you have to give the editor what they want. All the stories published in magazines have to follow guidelines that have been laid down by the magazine and you have to adapt your work to fit their guidelines. Even competitions have rules that must be adhered to. There is no point submitting your brilliant

story of two tho

usand words to a competition that states the maximum word count is sixteen hundred words. It will be disqualified. So whether we like it or not, fiction is edited one way or another.

It was also

nice to see Jeff again, he was a member of Wrekin Writers when I first joined many years ago.

Monday evening I went up to Bishops Castle to hear the crime writer Priscilla Masters www.priscillamasters.com Her story is very different to most. One of seven adopted children of different nationalities she grew up in Yorkshire. Her entry into writing was the result of an aunt asking her what she was going to do with her life. The rest, so they say is history. If you haven’t heard Cilla talk she’s well worth seeing, as for me I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Thursday evening I was off out again. This time I went to Church Stretton library to hear Gillian Linscott. Gillian started her career as a journalist covering such exciting stories as jumble sales and lost dogs. Eventually she moved into writing crime novels and gardening. She now lives and works at Hampton Court, no not that one, the one in Herefordshire where she gardens during the day and writes in the evening. Again I had a wonderful evening.

Friday afternoon I had coffee and cake in Craven Arms with Phil Rickman. Phil like Gillian was a journalist who has also turned his hand to writing fiction. Ghost hunting is his speciality and consequently the discussion did turn to ghosts and seeking them out. Whether you believe in ghosts or not, it was an interesting afternoon. Not quite sure though how far he goes with his research or whether he does it alone. I don’t think I would.

These events were arranged as part of the Bridgnorth and South Shropshire Literary Festival. I've had a wonderful time and learned a lot and am grateful to the organisers for arranging the festival. Hopefully it will be repeated next year but with better publicity. Also it was fantastic that there was so much going on right on my doorstep, now that does make a change.